Soul searching

So for some reason or another, i've been going through a period of life reevaluation, wondering what i want in life, where i am, and how i'm going to get myself where i wanna be. Perhaps it's because i'm now settling into working life and getting used to this new change of status, and the routine of my life has changed and bears some consideration. Perhaps it's because up until recently, she used to be the centre of my life, so now i begin to wonder if all those things were what i -really- wanted, after all.

don't think anybody reads this anymore

which is good. wonder if you ever set up an RSS feed with my blog?

So perhaps relationships are like economies, they go through these cycles and although the general trend is inflationary and to keep growing closer together, there are periods when it is difficult and you go into a deep depression. And this period might last a quarter, or maybe a year, but if you take enough expansionary policies you'll come out of it. And maybe, just like a recession, you might go through a structural change and lob off the bits which don't work, and focus your energies on the bits which do.

But of course, if you don't even want to be part of the capitalistic system, all this won't concern you.

Lengua

I would like one day to be hosting a dinner party with Lengua, and then have a housecat pounce on the food and make off with it before my guest can even try it.

Then I would look over, smile, and say:
"What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?"

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Of late i'm feeling that there's something missing in my life (quarter life crisis!), perhaps it's part of this whole pre-graduation trauma... the oh no i'm going back to work in some place where i might not be happy issue. Trying to scale back on schoolwork doesn't help, i've filled the time up with tutoring some cute kid which is rewarding but somehow just still doesn't cut it, and social events which are also like temporary distractions... maybe this is the long distance speaking? Sometimes i feel trapped within my own life.